«Diary Of A Wimpy Kid (Book 1)» by Jeff Kinney

Brought to you by Penguin.

Let me get something straight: this is a JOURNAL, not a diary. This was Mom's idea, not mine. But if she thinks I'm going to write down my "feelings" in here or whatever, she's crazy.

The only reason I agreed to do this at all is because I figure later on when I'm rich and famous, this book is gonna come in handy.

But for now I'm stuck with a bunch of morons.

Today is the first day of school, so I figured I might as well write in this book to pass the time.

Just don't expect me to be all "Dear Diary" this and "Dear Diary" that.